545 Playoffs: Ugliest Athletes (Round One, Series Three)

The underdog Pat Mcquistan beat favourite Joakim Noah in yesterday's quarter final matchup. Today's matchup is between Pavel Datsyuk of the Detroit Red Wings and Bartolo Colon of the New York Yankees. Let's start with Pavel.

Alright, what the fuck is wrong with Pavel Datsyuk's head? The shape of it in general just confuses me. He honestly reminds me of E.T. with some sort of weird combover. I think he's going to win this matchup, but not because he's goodlooking, but because Colon makes him look like Ryan Reynolds.

Pavel Datsyuk

What is there to say about Bartolo Colon? He's got all of the conventions of a 2/10. The unibrow, the double chin, the dirty teen stash, the eyes of a rapist. Seriously, he looks like he'd be the killer in an episode of Criminal Minds.

Bartolo Colon

Have you ever heard of win-win situations? Well, I think this is a lose-lose situation. Who do you think is the uglier between these two guys? You be the judge.

Posted By: The Say Hey Kid

Toronto Maple Leafs vs. New York Islanders

I've been watching the Islanders/Leafs game tonight, and thought there were a few things to take note on. Here they are:

• How does Brett Lebda have a job in the NHL? He is easily the worst player to play for a National Hockey League team this season. I honestly think he would struggle at the AHL or ECHL level. Seriously, when he took a brutal penalty tonight, I was actually happy. I was happy for two reasons. 1) It gives the Leafs an opportunity to improve their PK numbers, and 2) At least Lebda won't be on the ice for two minutes. When he takes a penalty, it's actually a good thing for the Maple Leafs - mainly because we don't have to worry about him losing a 1-1 battle or making one of his infamous giveaways that results in a direct goal for the other team. Lebda in the penalty box with the Leafs on a 5-4 penalty kill is actually better than the Leafs playing 5-5 with Lebda on the ice. I'm honestly disgusted that this guy makes 1.4 million dollars a season: It truly sickens me.
• How does Ron Wilson still have a job in the NHL? Why in the fuck is Timmy Brent playing the point on the powerplay? Wilson, you realize he's a 3rd or 4th line grinder with limited offensive upside? Almost anyone else on the team except for Lebda or Sjostrom would be a better option for the point than Timmy Brent.
• Why is Colby Armstrong the assistant captain of the Leafs? Lots of teams have tried making one of their role players a captain or assistant, and look where it has got them. The Oilers have been garbage under Horcoff, and the Thrashers are garbage under Ladd.
• Lebda is complete shit - WHY DOES HE HAVE AN NHL ROSTER SPOT?! Idsuf8ds8fuad9fid9fddfasdf

Posted by: The Say Hey Kid

Colorado Eagles Assistant Coach Goes Nuts!

You've probably been told "It's just a game!" a couple of times in your life. Well, someone should have said that to Colorado Eagles assistant coach Greg Pankewicz.

Apparently one of his players was abused by an official, and he didn't like it. Given the circumstances, I'm not sure this is the reaction or approach I would have had to the same situation. To each his own I guess. What's up with minor league coachs having tantrums and ripping their clothes off? Who knows.

Posted by: The Say Hey Kid

Major League Sequel??

My day just keeps getting better. I'm scouring the internet just trying to get a look at any of the sluts Charlie Sheen has been banging lately and I came across something much more interesting than a picture of Kacey Jordan's snatch.

Charlie Sheen would apparently be willing to get on board with a "Major League" sequel. This movie was absolutely phenomenal. Like, on the list of terrible/great sports movies, it goes:

- Mighty Ducks (entire series)
- Youngblood
- Blue Chips
- Major League

If you don't believe me, just take a look at the cast. And by that I really only mean Wesley Snipes, who played the stereotypical black showboat on the team. Without a doubt though, the best part was Charlie, sporting looks such as this:

If you don't want to see old Charlie rocking high top fades, taped together thick rimmed glasses, hurling 100 mph fastballs, and fucking teammate's wives, then you can get the fuck off my blog.


- posted by silverado

Let's keep talking 'Melo and Trade.

Let's take a deeper look into the Carmelo Anthony trade, shall we?

You'd think New York clearly wins this trade. In many cases, yeah, you're right. They'll walk away from this trade with the BEST piece going forward. However, Denver didn't leave this trade empty handed. The Nugs received some good pieces going forward which include forwards Danilo Gallinari, Wilson Chandler, and guard Raymond Felton. Denver receives numerous picks as well, which include: New York's 2014 first round pick, and Golden State's second round picks in 2012 and 13 (Golden State's picks come from the sign and trade of David Lee). Also, Denver will receive $3 million in cash. Denver will also receive center Timofey Mozgov, but really, who gives a sweet blue fuck about him?

How well did New York walk away from this trade you ask? Well simple, Carmelo Anthony and Chauncey Billups. These two will be the only useful players coming to New York from Denver. New York will also receive "old as fuck" point guard Anthony Carter, and the forward who peaked while at Duke alongside J.J., Sheldon Williams.

However, it should interesting to note that this is rumored to be the start of bringing in both Carmelo Anthony and Chris Paul. If you recall, Chris Paul made an interesting toast at Carmelo's Wedding last summer in New York about forming their own big three. His proposal included Carmelo Anthony, Chris Paul, and Amare Stoudemire. Should be interesting to see if Chris Paul trade rumors become big again with only a few days left before the trade deadline. We all know New Orleans doesn't want to lose him in free agency in 2012.

Now let's take a look at the Minnesota side of the trade. Considered just to be a separate trade with the New York Knicks. But by including the Wolves, Denver will save $25 million this season.

Minnesota will receive Anthony Randolph, The expiring contract of "Knick Legend" center Eddy Curry, and also another $3 million. New York will receive small forward Corey Brewer from the Wolves. Let me just say and I mean no disrespect to Corey Brewer, but New York unquestionably overpaid for theservices of Corey Brewer. Minnesota clearly won this trade. They save/receive money, and get a good piece in Anthony Randolph.

It should also be interesting to note that neither Gallinari, Felton, or even Mozgov may remain as Nuggets for very long. It's being reported Denver is looking to make more deals. It's being said that Gallinari doesn't want to go Denver and that he would like to play for the Clippers or even New Jersey. Felton is in a similar situation to the one he was in during his stint with Charlotte, as Ty Lawson looks to be taking the starting job for Billups. Denver seems to be interested in trading anyone besides Lawson as the Nuggets are sure he is the only one they're sure of keeping going forward.

More information on the rumors in the paragraph above, can be found at this link: HOOPSWORLD.



Posted by: G.A.C.

Debate of the Day: Hot Talk Show Hosts

I was pretty generous with that title. I could have titled it "Debate of the Day: Annoying Talk Show Hosts with no Viewers". Seriously though, who the fuck actually watches these shows? How do these women even have their own show? I guess I answered that question in the actual title. I should probably clarify who I'm talking about now too. Tyra Banks and Rachael Ray. I'll throw up the pics, then put my input in afterwards.

Rachael Ray

Tyra Banks

Alright, let's evaluate the situation here. Tyra is slightly more attractive, but she's also slightly more annoying than Rachael. Tyra wastes 2 hours of television a day (with her talk show and America's Next Top Model), whereas Rachael only wastes one hour of television with her show. Rachael can also cook amazing meals, but has an annoying voice. I'm kind of intrigued in this situation. People always make the paper bag joke for an unattractive face, but what do you do if they have a bad voice? I'm not entirely sure, but a part of me wants to find out. I'm going to go with Rachael on this one, but Tyra is really goodlooking in her own right, and would likely win in most people's opinion. Who would you choose?

Posted by: The Say Hey Kid

Sidney Crosby admitted into Green Oaks Mental Institution

No, but seriously, I was browsing online and came across a website that has a list of Sidney Crosby's superstitions that he practices prior to a game. Here is a list of a few of them:

• He won't call his mother on any game day because the last three times he has done this, he's been injured (the most recent being his broken foot a couple of years ago). I guess Maxime Talbot pulled a prank on him and called his mother prior to this years Winter Classic against the Caps.
• Once he's taped his sticks up before the game, he doesn't let anyone touch them. He doesn't even like his teammates going near them. If they touch his sticks or go near them, he'll re-tape all of them.
• When he's playing a hockey game in a road arena, he will only use his personal roll of tape. He won't even consider touching the opponents tape.
• If the team is travelling via a bus to an away game, he will lift his feet to touch the bus windows whenever they approach railway tracks.

I'll be the first to tell you I love Sid, and I consider him the best player in the NHL, but some of these superstitions are complete bullshit. When I was 23, I had a superstition of my own prior to watching the Leafs play; and it always worked. I would usually just down a 6-pack before a game, and the team would magically play better. I remember going to sleep satisfied and not pissed off over the fact that Toskala was the worst goaltender in the league. Hopefully Steckel's hit straightened out Crosby, and he stops acting like a fucking idiot. Being superstitious is one thing, being clinically insane is another.

Sidney Crosby in Green Oaks

Posted by: The Say Hey Kid